by James Clear

Although, in general, Liz possesses the more self-accepting nature in our relationship, and I am usually the more morally-punishing constant self-improver, it was actually Liz who got me to read Atomic Habits, recommending it after she listened to it on Audible (which, although she enjoyed it, she originally bought it just to use up some left over Audible credits).

This book was recommended to me by several different people who started new exercise, meditation, cooking, guitar, etc. habits after reading it when it was big about a year ago. I didn’t read it at the time, because: daily habits are already a big part of my life. Routine, repetition, and incremental improvement is how I evolve my relationship with myself and with the world. It was fun to read because it put names to lots of things that I already do: using a habit tracker, using a time and place for a habit cue, making triggers for good habits highly visible, and making triggers for bad habits invisible.

The largest net new idea from this book - and one which I do find very helpful - is the part about the importance of identity in making new habits. To use an example, the book basically states that your goal of exercising every day will fail if you fail to identify as the type of person who never misses work outs. That your goal of losing weight will fail if you do not identify as a healthy person. Or that your goal of praying everyday will fail if you don’t identify as a practicing member of a religion.

The advice about using identity transformation as a tool for habit transformation also helps free your from any one specific habit on any one specific day, because it gives you the context and agency of living out a lifestyle, instead of the tediousness of just carrying out a task.

I’ve taken the advice of this book of forming habits starting with personal identity and applied it to how I am forming my annual goals this year. Instead of thinking of things I wanted to accomplish, I first started with pieces of my identity that I wanted to form or amplify (e.g., belief in God is a core part of my identify). From there, I chose goals that will lead me to actualize this identity (e.g., this year I want to pray more). And from there I was able to map out the actions I want to turn into daily habits (e.g., read some sort of spiritual writing every day). I once I take those steps, I am then in a position to use my habit tracker to help me evaluate whether I am meeting my annual goals 🙂

This help me narrow down the scope of what I want to work on this year, and helped me feel ok saying “no” to things that I felt like I should give a try, but which weren’t really something that I feel are part of my identity (e.g., learn a musical instrument).